Huffington Magazine Issue 67 | Page 44

HUFFINGTON 09.22.13 INVISIBLE CASUALTIES ly, Joshua picked up the phone. In that final connection, all the love, all of life’s hopes and failures and regrets, the anger and despair, the secrecy and deception, all telescoped into those few precious minutes. And left, in the desperation of that moment, unspoken. “I said, ‘Josh, what’s going on?’” Don said. “I could hear him crying. He always put on a strong face for me. But he was crying and he said, ‘Dad, I’m so sorry, I love you. I’m so sorry!’” “I knew I had to keep him on the phone. I said, ‘Joshua, where are you?’” “I can’t tell you.” “I said, ‘Do you have a gun with you?’” “Yes, I do.” “Could you just unload it, please?” “I can’t do that.” “I was clutching at straws trying to keep him on the phone. ‘Please tell me where you are, please give me an address.’” Silence. Then in a choked voice, Joshua said the address. “Then suddenly his voice got real strong. He said, ‘Dad, I love you. I have to go,’ and he hung up.” Quickly, Don dialed 911 and relayed the address, sending cops speeding toward the townhouse. Don thought, maybe there’s hope. He called Emily. “Call everyone you know and get them over there,” he ordered. Don, 54, is a strong person. Warm, friendly, outgoing. In the 30 months or so since Joshua died, he has endured unimaginable suffering. Battered by shame, Navy Petty Officer Joshua Lipstein, shortly after his first deployment, preparing to report to duty on base.