Huffington Magazine Issue 61 | Page 11

Enter derachiever,” accurately describes what Morgan had hoped to convey. Had Morgan astutely decided to use the actual words “fameseeking underachiever” in conversation with Walker, this story would not be nearly as newsworthy as it is. This decision to make Morgan sound more professional actually lessens the impact of the story. (The Times does include a link to Talking Points Memo so its readers can go and get the actual story, which is nice.) Elsewhere, news organizations were even more pearl-clutchy. NBC News tells its readers that Morgan went on “an expletivelaced tirade,” containing “several disparaging names for the female anatomy.” They offer up “f------” at one point, but refrain from using “slutbag” entirely. The Wall Street Journal describes “a series of harsh expletives,” but only quotes Morgan as having said: “Man, see if you ever get a job in this town again.” The Wall Street Journal says that this is “one of Ms. Morgan’s more tame quotations,” but that’s giving it too much credit. The “you’ll never ___________ in this town again” is so cliched that it’s more euthanized than tame. LOOKING FORWARD IN ANGST Fox News, for reasons I cannot fathom, decided that the word “slutbag” was an important part of the story but nevertheless felt it needed minor censoring. It has presented its readers with “sl**bag” as an alternative. Lord only knows what Daily Mail readers were thinking as they read last night that Morgan used the word “s*****g” in its copy. What’s that supposed to be? “Sagging?” “Salting?” “Sapling?” The Mail really sandbagged its readers. Hey, “sandbag” would work as well. The Mail has since lessened the confusion by updating this to “s***bag,” so now their readers might merely think that that Morgan called Nuzzi a “shitbag,” which is ironically a more vulgar choice of expletive. At any rate, the one unknown here is whether Morgan meant to suggest that Nuzzi was a “slut” of such magnitude that she can gather and contain objects, much like a bag, or if she was an anthropomorphic sack, in which sluts might be conveniently discovered within. This is a question that shall probably be left unanswered, if not unasked. Ryan J. Reilly contributed reporting. HUFFINGTON 08.11.13