Huffington Magazine Issue 38 | Page 45

FAMILY UNDERTAKING your community or family. You can get mentally and physically exhausted.” HUFFINGTON 03.03.13 her presence. I wanted to talk to her.” Alison was alone with her mother only for a few minutes. “I was self-conscious Alison admits that Caroline’s funeral because people kept on coming in. But was tiring. I got to touch her hand briefly. She was Growing up as the youngest sibling in very cold. And it was a reminder that it a big Southern Baptist family in Louisiwas only her body.” ana, she had seen lots of death and had So when Caroline died, Alison spoke been to plenty of traditional funerals. to her every day, sometimes every hour. But even though they were She wrote entries in an onphysically easier than services line journal to remember how “I wanted for her daughter, she found Caroline’s death felt and to to have a them to be emotionally inexplain her decision to family little last complete events (especially so and friends: “I told Caroline time to when her parents died). that if she knew what a froube in her “My father died from bladfrou outfit I had her in she’d presence. der cancer when I was 16. be giving me the business. I wanted to And I just didn’t know what We compromised in that I let talk to her.” I needed at the time to grieve her stay barefoot under her for him,” she says. “And when big skirt. The girl never liked my mother died — the same year I was shoes ... There were a few changes in Carpregnant with Caroline — it was just this oline’s body over the next two days, not huge social event.” many, and they served to remind us that Her mother’s funeral was held back this was only her body, that her spirit had home in Shreveport at a large church been released. Everyone had time to sit designed to seat a few thousand, with with her, read to her ... I frequently found a reception before, a reception after, myself running into her room to tell her and lots of talking among hundreds of what I was doing, and it felt so natural.” guests in between. Before Caroline left the house, the par“There were so many family friends I ents took her sister, Kate, into the room hadn’t seen in years. People just kept on where she was held. “We’re saying bye to coming to say, ‘Hi,’ and, ‘You’ve got to see Caroline’s body,” they told her. “But she this cousin and that cousin.’ I just wantwill always be your sister and she wi