Huffington Magazine Issue 38 | Page 44

COURTESY OF RICHARD BENTLEY FAMILY UNDERTAKING HUFFINGTON 03.03.13 used the funeral home’s hearse, there’s been an uptick in families who want to use only select services of a funeral home. Just as hospice care for the dying gradually became mainstream over the decades, newer generations of less traditional funeral directors are more likely to be interested in helping make arrangements for home services, according to the National Funeral Richard Bentley Directors Association. (left) feels families “I don’t think there is a fushould neral director who is opposed to have more control over a family being more intimately the funeral involved as long as it better process. meets the needs of a family, but of death, things can go badly in this is an evolving process,” says a hurry,” says Patton. “SomePat Patton, the co-owner of Pattontimes there can be rapid decomposition, Schad Funeral & Cremation Services in blistering on the skins or fluids leaking Sauk Center, Minn., and a board memfrom the body, things that a family may ber of the NFDA. In his 34 years in the not be able to deal with. Our concern business, he’s been asked to help arrelated to home funerals is that people range one home funeral. “If you don’t may just not be ready.” want what we usually provide, how do In a culture where talk of death is we know what you do want? How do avoided, direct experiences like home we make it work for both of us? Funeral funerals have benefits and drawbacks. directors are certainly willing to help On one hand, seeing and sitting with a families take care of their dead at home, dead loved one can help a mourner acbut because it’s new and different and cept death, says Sue Wintz, who is a outside what would be normal for our consultant and managing editor at New business, it takes time.” York-based HealthCare Chaplaincy. He also isn’t sure home funerals are “That action is part of the healing,” says always the right choice. Wintz, who was a hospital and hospice “In general, deaths at home and a chaplain for 30 years. person caring for everything is fine. But But Wintz says that home funerals we know that, depending on the cause require “a lot of support and help from