Huffington Magazine Issue 2 | Page 45

> ROMANCE PREDATORS ❏ H  as someone fallen in love with you quickly? ❏ D  o they immediately want to leave the dating site to use IM or email? ❏ D  o they claim to be from the U.S. but working overseas; Nigeria or UK? And so on. Wheaton answered yes to every question. Romancscams.org is stocked with veterans of romance cons. Started in 2005, its founder is Barbara Sluppick, who started the group after she fell for a man online who claimed to be from the UK. “I knew that his accent was Nigerian,” Sluppick recalls. “I was just lucky enough to have a guy that I worked with that was Nigerian and I’d had many, many conversations with him.” Sluppick pulled herself out of the relationship before losing any money to her predator, but others she works with haven’t been as fortunate. Today, Romancescams.org has 19,000 active members posting about their experiences and supporting one another, the details of their stories helping to lift the veil off of the ways scammers operate. Sluppick say that the majority of romance scams she deals with originate in Ghana and Nigeria and that predators there have provided a road map for how they target and take advantage of victims. “They’re taking actual notes,” Sluppick says of the predators. “You say, HUFFINGTON 06.24.12 ‘Oh, I’m looking to have three kids and I want this and I want that.’ In a very short period of time, they become the dream person that you’re looking for.” According to Sluppick, a scammer’s first move is to get a victim off a dating site and on to e-mail or instant messenger — they might even say they cancelled their membership on the dating site because they found their perfect match. Then come the endearing nicknames — “baby,” “honey,” “sweetie.” Predators use the same pet name for all of their victims — everyone is just “sweetie,” for example — so they don’t screw up names when they’re IM-ing (mistakenly calling Jane, Mary, and outing themselves). Most scammers are men, analysts say, but they’re savvy enough to con their own: Whitty says that predators can use apps to disguise their voices over the phone, allowing a husky-voiced male to sound like a breathy, eager young woman. Digitally enhanced, the scams just keep coming. According to the FBI, there have been 2,600 romance scam complaints made in 2012 so far, and 790 of them were by males, with $3.6 million in reported losses. Sluppick notes that predators also use gifts as part of their artillery. Beyond merely softening up a victim, gift-giving allows predators to get a crucial bit of information: an address. With an address in hand, predators can set up a reshipping scam. They buy items with a stolen