Huffington Magazine Issue 17 | Page 48

HUFFINGTON 10.07.12 NINA BERMAN / NOOR /REDUX MIRACLE BABIES she and her husband were preparing to start another cycle to try for a second child, Kari found out she was pregnant, naturally. She is due in December. Her reaction to the news surprised her. “My first feeling was that I was angry. I was angry that this was happening after everything we had been through,” Kari said. “My feeling was, ‘We’re going to end up having a miscarriage.’ I was like, ‘This isn’t fair. How is this happening?’” When she got pregnant with her son, Kari was already on several medications to help prevent miscarriage; this time she was not. Though she and her husband are “over the moon” and “beyond excited” about the prospect of having another baby, that joy is tempered by the fear that her body will fail her, as well as the guilt she feels about being able to have a second baby naturally when so many women cannot. As an alum of the IVF world, her feelings about pregnancy — natural or otherwise — are defined by the turmoil of the process. “I just wanted to have a pregnancy I could enjoy, a normal pregnancy where I wasn’t scared all the time,” Kari said. “This was supposed to be that pregnancy for me, but it hasn’t been. I’m still in complete shock and disbelief that this is really happening.” Egg donors are listed by vital characteristics such as eye and hair color, height, weight, ethnicity, religion and educational background. Some eggs cost more than the standard rate because a donor may have more desirable characteristics.