Huffington Magazine Issue 1 | Page 32

Voices began to struggle for legitimacy in the workplace. Now men, who have always had legitimacy in the workplace, are struggling for legitimacy in the home.”  Or, as Charles E., a political science professor, father of four, and “trailing spouse” to his wife’s new political career put it: “My job is the ‘second’ one, so if I work less we have l ess money, but if I work more then the kids get less parenting. What I am feeling is Mommy Guilt.” Yes, it is. And the data show that other men are discovering the many versions of it, too:  n In 1977, 41 percent of women reported feeling torn between home and work, a number that inched up five percentage points over the next 30 years. Men, on the other hand, were at 31 percent back in the 70s, and at 59 percent today. In other words, men are more stressed about balancing life and work right now than women.   n The number of conflicted men is growing. Depending on how you define “stay-at-home-dad,” there are 157,000 fathers at home full time according to the last census, but up to two million who are primary caregivers and whose work HUFFINGTON 06.17.12 LISA BELKIN is purposefully flexible. And these figures do not include the millions of men who lost jobs during the worst of the recession and are home involuntarily. n Increasingly women are outearning men. Almost 40 percent of women are the bigger breadwinners, according to Liza Mundy’s new book, The Richer Sex: How the New Majority of Female Breadwinners is Transforming Daddy Guilt Percentage of men reporting to be torn between home and work: 31% 59% 1977 Sex, Love, and Family, compared to 25 percent in the 90s and five percent in the 70s.  Meaning if one parent is to become the primary caregiver, it is no longer, de facto, the mother.   n At the same time, men are more 2012 willing to entertain the thought of themselves as primary parents. One