How to Coach Yourself and Others Techniques For Coaching | Page 84

3.10 CREATING RAPPORT
A coach gives his coachee his full attention. By doing so, you make it
easier for the coachee to tell his story and enables him to look at he
could handle his problem better or even solve it. Giving attention you
also do by listening actively, by being genuine and by showing respect,
in other words by totally being there for the coachee.
As coach you tune into your coachee. You tune into his use of language,
words, intonation, attitude, movements and emotions. Do this
unobtrusively. If you tune into your coachee, it will become easier for
you to imagine what it would be like being him and having his problem.
Your coachee will also feel more at ease with you. This can be called
mirroring.
Coaching is a very special learning and development relationship.
Rapport is one of the active ingredients of coaching that makes it work.
More rapport between the coach and coachee will typically make the
coaching go more quickly. Less rapport will make it less effective. What
this means is that more time spent by the coach and their coachee up
front will lead to less effort later to produce results. Less effort up front
to create rapport will mean more effort is needed later to stimulate the
coachee to right action.
If you have a coaching role and you have a new coachee, who will be a
challenge, taking the time to establish rapport will make the coaching
more successful. In extreme circumstances the rapport building might
need to be 99% of the coaching relationship.
So what is rapport. The dictionary definition speaks of mutual trust. My
favourite definition of trust is ‘an absence of vulnerability.’ So rapport
could be considered a ‘mutual absence of vulnerability.’
How is that developed from the coach’s side of the relationship. Here
are five ideas.

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