How to Coach Yourself and Others Techniques For Coaching | Page 334
However, the most effective to give and the most fun to receive is a
combination of all three. When a compliment, endorsement and
acknowledgement are combined it's a very affirming and motivating
experience for the recipient, and is a "feel-good opportunity" for the
giver.
Examples of the combination are:
"Great job! You really have a talent with numbers. You're such an
intelligent person I can always count on you to get it right!"
"Nice play. Your athletic ability is outstanding. You are a natural
athlete and have a can-do attitude, which makes you a joy to coach."
"Nice jacket. You have a talent for choosing just the right thing to
wear, and this outfit emphasizes the lovely color of your eyes."
Be Kind To Yourself Too
Giving praise and appreciation not only applies to how you speak to
others, but also to how you talk to yourself. Hopefully your self-talk is
positive and helps you feel validated and motivated. Remember that
when you speak to yourself you can choose to be vague with "nice job",
or specific and affirming with an endorsement, acknowledgement or
combination.
Of course, it goes without saying that compliments, endorsements and
acknowledgements should only be given when you truly feel what
you're saying and are sincere with your comments. People can detect
insincere praise instantly and you will loose all credibility if you give
praise you don't feel.
So, I'd like to suggest that in the next week you take some time to notice
how you verbalize your appreciation for others and yourself. Do you
thoughtlessly hand out compliments, or do you give thought to what
you want to say and take the time to share a heartfelt endorsement or
acknowledgement? You may find that as you do more endorsing and
acknowledging, your clients/customers, employees, family and friends
will seem to blossom, and you will blossom along with them.
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