How to Coach Yourself and Others Techniques For Coaching | Page 208

from Pole A and whose voice is speaking the message from Pole B?"
Frequently it is the voice of each of the client's parents.
DIFFERENTIAL DIRECTION John Raven Mosher and Brigid Yukman
have written on the need for differential directing styles, and they have
identified four primary styles: caring leader, emotional stimulator,
director, and meaning attributor. When clients are dealing with
abandonment and telling stories of lovelessness, the director needs to
be caring (e.g., protective, genuine, encouraging, providing unrequested
unconditional acceptance for being, etc.). When the client is dealing
with issues of betrayal and stories of joylessness, the director needs to
be an emotional stimulator (e.g., charismatic, playful, intimate, creative
and emotionally available and transparent). When the client is
disempowered and telling stories of disempowerment, the director
needs to be challenging (e.g., setting limits, norms and direction,
challenging current behavior, asking the client for answers, etc.). When
the client is in chaos and telling stories of meaningless, the director
needs to provide structure (e.g., interpreting reality, naming,
normalizing and identifying emotional states and experiences, teaching
cognitive techniques, providing a frame