How to Coach Yourself and Others Popular Models for Coaching | Page 145

Examples of Irrational believes that lead to problematic
behaviour

Irrational beliefs

Example

Examples of Disputes

I must be loved or
approved by almost
everyone in my life
or else I am not
good or I am
worthless

My children don’t
like me.
I must be a useless
mother

Where is the evidence
that your children
don’t like you?

I should be
perfectly
competent,
adequate and
achieving
everything in order
to be worthwhile

I am not good in
Mathematics. I
guess I am not a
good student

What makes a good
student?

Certain people I
deal with are bad,
wicked or
villainous,
therefore I should
punish them

My neighbour
doesn’t care about
cleaning his area. I
guess I don’t have
to bother about
the rubbish that’s
stuck in his drain

It is terrible and
upsetting when
things don’t go the
way I want them to
be

This holiday is not
fun because we
didn’t manage to
visit the
playground

My unhappiness is
caused by others or
external events not
under my control

I failed my test
because I could
not study last
night. There was
too much noise

Is it so terrible not
being able to visit the
playground?

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