How to Coach Yourself and Others Influencing, Inter Personal and Leadership Skills | Page 40

• Picture yourself leaving work on time once we make this change (or some other way
their life will improve once they agree with you)
5. Action
Once you sense that you are approaching agreement, you need to cement it by
suggesting the next step or action that will put your solution in motion. Don’t wait – act
as soon as you can so that the other person is not left stewing and thinking things over
more (and perhaps changing their mind).

3/ The Integrity Principle
When you are persuading or influencing another, you are assuming a position of
leadership. However, you won’t be perceived as a leader unless you exhibit the trait of
integrity. Integrity can be defined simply as being true to your word, being authentic in
your actions and speech, and demonstrating the kind of behavior that you expect others
to have. In other words, don’t ask others to trust or believe in you or your solution if you
haven’t demonstrated that you are trustworthy.
Integrity is something that you have to practice continually. It takes effort to honor your
word every time and to be the example you want from others even when you are under
stress or simply have a personality conflict. But the benefits you can gain from
developing integrity are enormous when compared to the damage you can do in the
workplace – and to your ability to persuade others - if you lack it.
Think for a moment about characteristics of people who have tried to persuade you that
you didn’t like.
What, speci fically, were the attitudes, behaviors, or traits of that person that has you
still thinking of them in a negative light? Probably you would list things like favoring
certain people, not coming through on promises he or she made, gossiping, taking credit
for another person’s work, or treating you disrespectfully. All of these issues can be
traced to a lack of integrity.
So how do you practice integrity?
There are three key areas that you can concentrate on developing. As you read each
description, ask yourself how you would feel someone trying to convince you of
something did not possess these key characteristics.
1. Sincerity
Also called authenticity, people with this facet of integrity:
• Do not put up a false front
• Accept responsibility for their commitments and strive to meet them
• Are honest about their own limitations
• Accept responsibility for their mistakes
• Tell the truth