How to Coach Yourself and Others How to Influence, Persuade and Motivate | Page 73

4.2.1 Match the Person’s Sensory Modality
To match a person’s sensory modality means taking all of the information
you learned in chapter 3 and putting it into use. You will want to listen for
the indicator words and eye movements that were covered and then
respond in a similar way.

4.2.2 Mirror the Person’s Physiology
Since so much of our communication is non-verbal, we receive the
majority of our information from another person through the subconscious
messages they are sending with their physiology or body language. This is
a great reason to understand body language because you can use it to send
the message to the other person that you are on the same wavelength as
they are. Mirroring others is very natural – we actually often do it
subconsciously and automatically when we feel rapport with someone.
Body language is a useful tool that you can learn to use.
You can mimic another’s body language when you want to build
rapport with them.
You can use a person’s body language to gauge how well your
attempts to
persuade or influence are going. Are you doing well or is there
something you need to change?
To see this, next time you are in a conversation that you are enjoying or
with whom it is important to you to make a good impression, notice their
body language. Now notice yours. Chances are, you have subconsciously
mimicked their body language. If they lean forward, you lean forward. If
they cross one foot over their knee, you do the same. This is our automatic
response to someone that we want to establish a positive connection with
– a