How to Coach Yourself and Others From Dependency to Inter Dependency | Page 8
As a principle centred person
You try to stand apart from the emotion of the situation and from other factors that would act on you,
and evaluate your opinion. Looking at the balanced whole - the work-needs, family-needs and other
needs that may be involved and the possible implications of the various alternative decisions, - and
you try to come up with the best solution, taking all factors into consideration.
You might make the same choice with a number of other centres, but there are several important
differences:
1. You are not being acted upon by other people or circumstances, but you are proactively choosing
what you determine to be the best alternative. You make your decisions consciously and
knowledgeably.
2. You know your decision is most effective because it is based on principles with predictable longterm results.
3. What you choose to do contributes to your ultimate values in life.
4. You can communicate to your wife and boss within strong networks you’ve created in your
interdependent relationships.
5. You’ll feel comfortable about your decision. Whatever you choose to do, you can focus on it
and enjoy it.
In order to become principle-centred, you must:
First be aware of, and develop, your own proactive nature (habit one)
Be aware of your paradigms and understand how to shift them and align them with your
principles
Have a vision of and a focus on the unique contribution that is yours to make (habit two)
This foundation then allows you to practice effective self-management and become principle-centred,
day in and day out (habit three).
In addition to self-awareness, imagination and conscience, independent Will is what really makes selfmanagement possible.
The ability to make decisions and choices and to act in accordance with them.
The degree to which we are successful is measured by our personal integrity: our ability to make and
keep commitments, the value we place on ourselves, the honour with self, the discipline to act in
accordance with our principles, values and purpose in life : our mission.