How to Coach Yourself and Others Empowering Coaching And Crisis Interventions | Page 124
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Emotional Labeling
During a crisis situation, feelings are often confusing and hard to define. Helping the person label the emotions that
he or she is feeling helps him or her to make sense and gain some control of these emotions. Labeling the emotions
also gives the person a chance to clarify and correct the perceptions of the crisis service provider. Crises happen as
a result of some loss, real or perceived, in a person's life. The pain felt in a crisis is grief over that loss. The loss
may be something you can put your hands on like an automobile, money, or a home. It may also be less tangible,
like loss of self-'esteem, power, freedom, or prestige The resulting grief is the same. There may be a number of
losses present in a single event. For instance, it is not unusual for a widow to lose financial well-being because of her
husband's death; thereby she loses security, power, prestige, and quite possibly friends and social contact.
Two key elements in any crisis are grief/loss and anxiety. No one can predict exactly what a grieving person will feel
like. However, there are stages identified by Elizabeth Kubler-Ross, which are seen in most people experiencing grief.
The five stages of grief are:
1) Denial;
2) Anger;
3) Sadness/depression;
4) Bargaining; and
5) Acceptance
These stages provide a road map of sorts that point out where someone may be in the process of his or her grief. Grief
doesn't progress through the stages and end there. Rather, it seems like a series of loops, traversing the same ground
over and over. We may be at different stages with each aspect of our grief at any given time.
The following responses may or may not occur as a grief reaction. This is not meant to be a complete list; other
reactions may occur that are quite normal. Emotional reactions and their somatic, or physical, counterparts often occur
in "waves", lasting a varied period of time.
Emotional responses
Behavioral responses
Sadness/Abandonment/Despair
Anger/Rage/Resentment - Irritability/Vengefulness
Relief
Fear/Panic/Anxiety/Worry
Guilt
Feeling Lost/Numbness
Hopelessness/Helplessness/
Crying at unexpected times
Hostile reactions to those offering help or solace
Restlessness
Lack of initiative or desire to engage in activities
Difficulty sleeping
Constantly talking about the loved one and his death
Isolation or withdrawal
Increased smoking/alcohol use
Somatic (physical) responses
Cognitive responses
Tightness in the throat
Shortness of breath
Empty feeling in the stomach
Nausea / Headaches / Dry mouth
Weakness, overall lack of physical strength
Delusions/Hallucinations
Nightmares
Poor attention span/Indecision/Slowed thinking
Disorientation/Memory problems/Blanking out
Anxiety is an emotional response that can be expected to manifest in any crisis situation, because there are no
answers, and seemingly no resolution. People may become afraid of the unknown or what they fear might
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