How to Coach Yourself and Others Coaching Families

The therapeutic team can enable the therapist to achieve this by presenting the multiple perspectives from which the family situation can be understood. 10.11 Sticking in one time frame Therapists should not stick in one time frame, but move the focus of their questions and discussion between the past, present and future. 10.12 Agreeing / not challenging ideas Therapists should not be in a continual state of agreement with the family’s ideas. They should remain curious and challenging about the nature and content of these ideas, in order to introduce new unexplored possibilities and ideas. 10.13 Ignoring information that contradicts hypothesis Therapists should not ignore, or minimise information presented by the family which contradicts their own ideas and hypotheses, rather they should take this information seriously and use it to modify and expand their working ideas. 10.14 Dismissing ideas The ideas presented by the family about the difficulties with which they are struggling, or the process of therapy itself should not be dismissed by the therapist. 10.15 Inappropriate affect The therapist’s affect should match that of the family, and would be considered inappropriate if it remained dissimilar from family for an extended period of time. One example might be if the family were feeling optimistic about change and the progress they were making, and the therapist remained pessimistic. There may be times, when a mismatch of affect is used transiently, in order for the therapists to take a position in relation to the family as a way of questioning or challenging their ideas. 10.16 Ignoring family affect Therapists should pay attention to the affect that the family is showing in the session, and not ignore strong expressions of affect during the sessions. This may be particularly relevant when a member of the family shows distress during the meeting, either by sad or angry behaviour. 10.17 Ignoring difference Therapists should not ignore issues of difference between themselves and the family or within the family. These may be differences in views, beliefs, gender, abilities, class or race, and should be raised by the therapist in a sensitive and open manner for further exploration. 230

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