Honors College Art & Science of Emotions Fall 2017 (1:20 p.m.) Love Journal | Page 6

that the couple eventually develops feelings related of eros, instead of starting the relationship based on eros, which is how most marriages
we are familiar with start. Physical attractiveness is something that is an important component when it comes to who we are going to talk to,
date, and possibly marry. If we aren’t attracted to them we won’t want to enter a relationship with them. This means our relationships are
built on the foundation of eros. Over time, as these feelings fade, eros is replaced with philia. If you have a family there is a reciprocity
component to the relationship, based on obligation to keep the family together. Sometimes, people might stay together simply because they
cannot afford to live on their own, which also falls under the umbrella of philia. If there is a need that can only be met by another person
and you still feel drawn to them because they are satisfying this need, it is philia (‘Philosophy of Love’, Pp 2-4). When Wasa says that
love always endures, it appears she is talking about philia (‘Kristina Wasa’, P.9). Some couples remain together without there being a roman-
tic component later in life; instead there is more of a friendship component instead. The example that comes to mind is the cute elderly couple
that are obviously not capable of sexual feelings but still feel philia towards each other; these relationships that endure definitely aren’t
based on eros. It appears from the numbers that relationships that are founded on eros aren’t as successful as relationships that start with
philia. In a sense, this means we are doing love wrong, which is a thought that might mortify most people. Most Americans would much rather
go on ‘The Bachelor’ to find love than enter into an arranged marriage, even though they’d be set up for failure and they don’t even know it.
Lights. Camera. Action. These three things are a horrendous combination if someone is trying to find someone to spend the rest of
their life with. The sex hormones (estrogen and testosterone) are important for developing sexual desire for someone else. When you’re
surrounded by a bunch of other people competing for the affection of the same person and the ‘testosterone is flowing’, the attraction you feel
towards someone else is going to be enhanced. Enhancing these feelings to a point that will be unattainable during your life with them will
ultimately cause more harm than good, and the sexual desire might eventually disappear altogether. The hormones that determine attraction to
another person are dopamine, norepinephrine and serotonin. When you’re in a situation as stressful and nerve-wrecking as having millions of
people watching your every move, the adrenaline (norepinephrine) will be flowing (Wu). This means the attraction you feel towards another
person might be misleading. When these hormones are at peaks levels during the time spent on a TV show, the feelings you have may be
genuine at the time but might not be sustainable in the future. . These contestants almost have a euphoric feeling when around the person they
6