Homeless in Paris Homeless in Paris | Page 40

B"H striking out a claim in my Jewish heritage. The journey strides forthwith. There has to be reason to this madness, maybe the potion of martyrdo m is an ego -identity, indicative of imbalance in the mental health that we shall presume can be healed. I indicated previously that I wrote these passages in the vein of internal expansion uniquely in order to keep abreast of myself during the identity crisis I was going through at the age of sixty. Life's burdens had taught me that no matter how steadily one seems to be progressing on his or her course through life, almost anything could occur to knock the wheels fro m the rails . The me mory cells lighting up my imagination here and now. I a m readying to leave the home and family I had built upon the inspiration I should go forth to make an exploratory trip to America, the land of the brave : to start a new lifestyle ! This was a test of whether the brain maintains soul essence over great distances. The outco me of that research has indicated to the contrary. I started packing the absolute minimum of what I need to take with me by organizing everything into suitcases many weeks preceding my departure. The time I spent in Safrascity was built on the pre mise Ala n would be pleased if we could return to the good feelings we sha red back fro m when we used to strut about the ca mpus in East Lansing. I had actually landed employment as a kashrut supervisor in a popular restaurant patronized by the religious community. On the New Year's Day celebrated by Chinese people living in their suburban western coast of America, I was traipsing about the street in the attire of the Funny Rabbi celebrating Purim. The spirit of Mickey ignited within me, and I enacted the role of the Music Ma n - raising and tossing a mock baton high, a one -man parade. Life lures me to disguise and to deport myself without any consideration other than how I chose to act. I miss the free impulses to which I gave expression where then nobody, or socia l constraints restrained my speech or behavior. There were many empt y spaces in the world between my wanting to feel at home, secure, in Israel near family and the designations that Truly Blue Alan Braid had expected to be proffered when he agreed to sponsor my being his guest in Safrascity for three weeks. The author choo ses not to dwell o n unpleasant me mories that no longer remain intact. I should wis h 40