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After he was resettled and placed in a reception centre in his new country , Ali started going to school . But he did not talk much , looked no-one in the eye , and took lunch alone . At night , the nightmares returned , and he woke up screaming . He turned on the light and calmed himself but kept his eyes open and stayed awake . Ali looked nervous every time someone approached him , and if someone came too close , he walked away . In class , his feet were in constant movement and he often stared out of the window , paying no attention to what the teachers said to him .
Many of these reactions persisted : hyperarousal , mistrust , anxiety , social withdrawal and nightmares . He was triggered by the voice of an older man he met .
A helper at the reception saw all this and invited Ali on regular trips to chat . At first , Ali was reluctant , but the helper explained that daylight and movement would help him to sleep . When he tried it , he found it was good to get out . They talked about how he could change the stories in his nightmares and do grounding exercises , such as the Safe Place exercise . When he woke at night , the exercise created a safe environment in his mind . The conversations went better when they walked in the fresh air rather than sat in the office . Because Ali ’ s personal boundaries had been invaded by his stepfather , Ali needed to decide how close the helper should be . When they walked , it was easier for Ali to regulate the distance from his helper .
After they had talked about what happened to him , Ali told the helper that he became nervous when someone came too close to him because it triggered bad memories . He would walk away . In the classroom , he said he often had restless legs and had difficulty sitting still . At other times he stared out of the window without being able to pay attention to what the teachers said . To help him manage his agitation and dissociation , the helper taught him some grounding exercises . She explained that other boys in his situation reacted the same way and that these responses to very painful experiences were normal .
The helper showed Ali the Grounding the Body exercise . He pushed himself back in his chair and reminded himself that he was in the present and not in danger . They also explored the window of tolerance , which helped Ali understand the difference between being under- and over-activated . Slowly but surely , he became better acquainted with his reactions and began to understand why he reacted so strongly .
When the helper learned that Ali used to play football , she arranged for him to participate in football training with some of the other boys at the centre and gradually he began to settle into the social community . The reception centre also possessed exercise equipment and he started weight training , coached by members of the staff . Through these physical activities , Ali became more confident of his body . He felt he was “ taking his body back ”, re-owning it . Since the abuse , he had not felt that his body was his ; he felt his body had been taken from him and he felt no pride or joy , or clarity about his boundaries . He recovered the physical memory of being strong and resilient that he had before . As he gradually regained his skills and learned to control his reactions , he began to concentrate better at school . His taste for education and hope in the future revived , which motivated him further .
APPENDIX