5 . Overly Harsh Discipline .
6 . Sexualising the Relationship with a Child or Teen .
7 . Sexually Abusing a Child orTeen .
8 . TurningChildrenAgainstTheirMother .
protective services for imagined offences . He may throw things , stomp around , drive too fast , or threaten violence including suicide . Mothers often give in to their controlling partners , to protect their children .
5 . Overly Harsh Discipline .
Controlling men often tell a mother that she is too “ soft ” with her children . He might obligate a mother to use harsher discipline than she thinks she should . Or if the children are frightened of his discipline , they may blame the mother for not shielding them from this mistreatment .
6 . Sexualising the Relationship with a Child or Teen .
Some controlling men flirt with their partners ’ daughters ( and sometimes with their own daughters ). This flirting alienates a woman from her daughter if it makes one or both of them uncomfortable . A woman ’ s partner should not flirt with her daughter , and an adult man should not flirt with a teenager . The adult is always responsible for keeping this relationship non-romantic and nonsexual .
7 . Sexually Abusing a Child orTeen .
An abuser will create rifts between a woman and her child if he plans to sexual‐ ly abuse that child . The more strained the relationship be‐ tween the mother and child , the greater the likelihood that he will be able to sexually abuse the child ( or teenager ) undetected . The child feels forced to lie to the mother to cover up the abuse and then grows angry with the mother for failing to protect him or her .
8 . TurningChildrenAgainstTheirMother .
Children learn to accommodate the behaviours of a controlling man as a survival strategy . To satisfy the adult they perceive as powerful and possibly dangerous , children often laugh at a controlling man ’ s putdowns of their mother and gang up with him against her . Children may be bribed , pushed , or just inspired into degrading or spying on their mother or even hurting her physically . In effect , the children are forced to extend the reach of the controlling man .
Even without physical violence , when a controlling man deprives a mother of the resources she needs to protect and provide for her child properly , he is