Healing and Hypnotherapy Volume 5, Issue -3, 1 September 2020 | Page 24

There is no easy quick-fix or five-step-solution for letting go of feelings such as
anger, fear, and grief because letting go is a process. It can take a while. But the
good news is that letting go is a process that helps us to grow, mature, and find
more happiness and inner freedom than we thought ever possible. Sometimes your
heart needs to break a little for the light to get in.
What is the Opposite of Letting Go?
The opposite of letting go is attachment. When we attach or identify with our
thoughts, we suffer. On the other hand, when we stop attaching to our thoughts and
simply see them for what they are: energy that we assign meaning to, we
experience freedom.
Common thoughts that we attach to which create emotions such as anger, rage,
disgust, disappointment, anxiety, fear, grief, and depression, include:
She should have been a good mother.

If he hadn’t cheated, I would have been happy.

Things should have gone differently.

I should have a much nicer life by now.

He/she shouldn’t have died.

My boss should have promoted me.

If I stay a little longer, he will stop his drinking.

If I did that differently, I would be much happier by now. She has to change or I
won’t find peace.

They are controlling my life. 

Everything was much better in the past.

I will be happy in the future when I get what I want.
As self-inquiry teacher, Byron Katie writes, When I argue with reality I lose, 100%
of the time. But what does this mean? 

When we attach to our beliefs about how life should go, we suffer each and every
time because we are resisting what is right here and right now. When we resist
reality, we also tend to adopt the role of the victim, which causes even greater
suffering.
The truth is that how can we 100% know that something is completely good or bad
for us? While something like a divorce or death may immediately seem like a
terrible thing, how do we know that it is completely bad? Can we see every
possible future outcome and consequence of such an occurrence in the present