Harmony in Marriage
47
about her because you saw something? And was it not going
on, even before you became aware of it?” I asked. People label
the one who gets caught, a ‘thief’. But even those who steal
without getting caught are thieves. Here, only the ones who get
caught are called thieves. You fools! Why are you calling him
a thief? He was a simple man. He got caught because he was
an amateur. The expert thieves never get caught.
Men who want peace of mind in regards to the conduct
of their wives, should marry a woman who is unattractive, so
that no one would want her. She herself would say, “Nobody
wants to keep me. Only my husband will keep me, he is the
only one who takes care of me.” Then she would remain
absolutely sincere to you. But if she is beautiful, then others
undoubtedly will enjoy her. If she is beautiful, they will lust after
her. Whenever someone marries a beautiful woman, I think of
the predicament he is going to be in. If she is unattractive, only
then there will be a safe side for him as far as his marriage is
concerned.
When one has a beautiful wife, he will forget God, won’t
he? And if the husband is handsome, the wife will forget God.
That is why the older generation had the saying, “Keep the farm
chopat (flat) and a woman kobaad (unattractive, idiotic).”
What are these people like? They ‘dine’ wherever they
see a ‘hotel,’ (the moment they see a woman, they will enjoy
her). So there is no use in harbouring suspicions. Suspicions
cause misery.
Some men are such that if the wife comes home a little
late, they will become suspicious of her. Suspicion is something
that you should absolutely shun. Nothing is going to happen
outside the limits of your karmic account. When she comes
home late, explain things to her but do not suspect her.
Suspicion adds fuel to the fire. Alert her, but do not suspect her.