38
Harmony in Marriage
innocent, naïve, and immature. What do you think? What does
justice tell you?
Draw attention to only the faults they are not aware of or
cannot see for themselves. If you nag them about their mistakes
they already know of, you will hurt their ego. They will then
wait for a chance to repay you. They wait for that opportunity.
What is the need for this? There is no need to call their attention
to things they already understand.
If it (your problem) is too bitter, then you should swallow
it alone, how can you allow the women to drink it? After all we
are Mahadevji (Lord Mahadev symbolizes a being that can
swallow all the poisons and bitterness of the world without any
complaints or retaliation). Are we not Mahadevji? Men are
like Mahadevji. If the situation gets too much, you can tell her,
“You don’t worry, you go to sleep, I’ll take care of it.” Don’t
the poor ladies give us a lot of support in life? So then how can
we afford to have problems with them? If you hurt her in any
way, then you should repent for it secretly. Tell her, “From now
on, I will not hurt you. I made a mistake. Please forgive me.”
What kinds of hurt take place in your home? What kind
of arguments? What kind of discord? If you both write all this
down on a paper and bring it to me, I will solve them all for you
in an hour. They occur because of misunderstanding, nothing
else.
All the problems of the home should stay within the four
walls of your home. This is how you should live together as a
family. If you make just this much of a change, it is very good.
There should be absolutely no quarrelling. You should live
within your means. If you do not have enough money, then you
should not be in a hurry to buy saris. You should be conscious
of not putting your husband in a financial difficulty. Spend only
if you have the money.