36
Harmony in Marriage
me all the time.” Our people (Indian people) deliberately point
out minor and obvious mistakes, and that is why their lives are
so full of clashes. What do you think? Do you have any
objection to thinking a little on this point?
Questioner : If we point out her mistakes, then she will
not make the same mistake again will she?
Dadashri : Oh ho! You want a reason to preach! Yes,
there is nothing wrong in pointing out her mistakes. What I am
telling you is that you can only do so, if she appreciates you
telling her. If she tells you, “It’s a good thing you pointed out my
mistake, I was not aware of it,” then it is okay for you to do
so. Tell me dear, do you appreciate it when he points out your
mistakes?
Questioner : No.
Dadashri : What is the point in showing her the mistake
she is already aware of? If there is something wrong with the
cooking will she not know when she eats the meal herself? So
there is no need for you to say anything. If she was not aware
of her mistake and you were to point it out to her, she may
appreciate it. Only Indian men do this.
When I lived on the third floor in Santa Cruz in Bombay,
tea used to be brought up to me. Some days they would forget
to put sugar in the tea. I would drink the tea telling Dada within,
“Sahib, put some sugar in this tea,” and He would. I would
drink the tea even if there were no sugar in it. Interference was
not my nature. Later on, everyone would be rushing around to
bring the sugar. I would ask them, “Why did you bring sugar?”
They in turn, would ask, “Why did you not ask for sugar, the
tea was not sweet?” I would reply, “Why do I need to tell
you?” Do you understand what I am saying?
I asked one man if he ever pointed out his wife’s