petals of wisdom, hope, inspiration, and truth by Keitha
Self-Esteem and God
Parton
In sociology and psychology, self-esteem
mirrors
a
person's
general
emotional
assessment of his or her own value. It is a
judgment of oneself, as well as an inward look
toward the self.
I will be the first to admit that I struggle with
my self-esteem. I was raised in a home where
my dad was an alcoholic, and when he was
completely intoxicated he was the nicest person
you could ever be around. However, on the days
that he wasn’t drinking, he was extremely
verbally abusive. He would say really mean and
hurtful things to my mom, my sister and I, that
would cut to the bone.
After living with years of abuse, it starts to
grow inside a person’s heart, soul and mind.
Then, eventually, the negativity takes over, and
becomes a part of who a person feels they are.
When I was fifteen years old I gave my life to
Christ, and felt a love and acceptance from Him
that was like no other….but after a while I
strayed. I started searching for the physical and
emotional affection that I wasn’t receiving at
home, and found myself in several abusive
relationships. I was so needy for approval and
affection, that I was willing to accept this as
normal just as long as the boys/men acted like
they loved me. It wasn’t until after I was left
pregnant with twins to raise on my own by one
of these want-to-be-Romeo’s, that I started to
explore self-love, appreciation, and acceptance.
Now that I am older, I wish I could tell you that I
have been able to move past the ab