Get Text Your Ex Back Review PDF eBook Book Free | Page 12

BEFORE YOU TEXT
like crazy in the back of their heads). If your ex got to the point
where they broke things off because you weren’t moving forward
together, it can actually be good news. It means they’re still at-
tracted to you and see potential in you, but are frustrated by a
certain level of Peter Pan’s “child who won’t grow up” that they see
going on. Your job is going to be to convince your ex that you’re
ready to bring things to the “next level,” whatever that might be,
or to convince them that it’s not time to go to that level yet.
• Feeling “nagged” or unappreciated/Can’t “relax” in the rela-
tionship. I certainly see this one a lot. Dr. John Gottman (who’s
an AMAZING relationship researcher at the University of Washing-
ton) says that contempt is the number one indicator of whether
or not a relationship will stand the test of time. And one of the
biggest ways men and women show contempt for each other is by
constantly nagging and criticizing. If in the past you were con-
stantly criticizing your ex, measuring them against an unattain-
able ideal, or focusing more on their flaws t han on t heir positives,
you’re going to have to learn to accept your ex for who they are
and rebuild a lot of trust and self esteem. I recommend you read
Dr. Gottman’s work and take it to heart. You can learn more at
• “I met someone else.” The grass is always greener, huh? Finding
out the person you love is with someone else can feel like getting
stabbed in the gut (believe me, I know). It’s also completely possible
that once they “settle in” with a new person, they’ll realize what a
good thing they left behind. Your job here will be to put your best
face forward, be as unbothered by what’s happened as possible,
and slowly open the door to reconciliation.
• Betrayal/Cheating. I get a lot of emails about this one. If your
ex broke up with you because of cheating, it’s PROBABLY because
you cheated on him or her (though sometimes someone will cheat,
realize they cheated because they wanted out of their existing re-
lationship, and then pull the trigger).
Actually, this is as good a spot as any to talk about WHY people
cheat in the first place, and some basics about human psychology
and evolution.
When a guy cheats it almost never has anything to do with
his wife or girlfriend. This is hard for women to get their heads
around, but when a man cheats it often is for basic, unemotional
reasons. He cheats because his testosterone is driving him to-
wards that woman like a freight train and he thinks that he can’t
help himself. I’m not saying guys SHOULD cheat (I firmly believe
we should keep the promises we make), but if you’re a woman who’s
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