The imposter also likes to think beyond your control. Examples of this are the past, the future, and what other people think. If what’ s preventing you from taking the next step is a fear of judgment, remember that other people’ s thoughts are beyond your control. Your imposter may convince you that it is and you must present as perfect or else, but it’ s the opposite.
As Lisa says:“ You can’ t control what other people call perfect.” Everyone has their own standards or ways of doing things. Too many cooks spoil the broth, and you hold yourself steady when faced with waves of criticism. It’ s not necessary to listen to what everyone thinks of you or your work— take what resonates and leave what doesn’ t. Who knows, those people that you’ re worried about might have even forgotten what you’ ve done or said.
4. Don’ t compare yourself to others.
This is a never-ending pit that most people fall into. As they say,“ comparison is the thief of joy.” Though it’ s cliche, the saying still rings true. You can look up to someone as inspiration, but you can’ t be like them. On the other hand, you can put yourself or your journey down in favour of someone else.
“ You can’ t be like others,” Lisa said.“ Don’ t compare your chapter 1 to someone’ s chapter 20.”
If other people’ s thoughts are out of your control, so are their actions and lives. It’ s unfair to you if you use someone else’ s life or deeds as a standard for your own.“ You don’ t know what it took to get to what they do,” she explained.
Focus on what you can do and what you can control. Believe that you are enough and your imposter’ s voice will waver.
5. If you are still struggling with self-doubt, share your feelings with a friend.
If self-doubt persists, turn to a friend, mentor, or family member. It’ s likely that they’ ve experienced something similar and can give you some wisdom or a new perspective.
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8 ISSUE 55 OCTOBER 2025 / WWW. AFMA. ORG. AU