uilding
confidence in
yourself means
developing self-trust, being comfortable in your own skin, allowing yourself to be vulnerable and recognizing your value. Here are some of my thoughts on building confidence while dating.
Know your value
Be positive about yourself and what you bring to the table. Maybe you’re funny, thoughtful, or generous. Feeling good about yourself comes from knowing your strengths and working on your weaknesses. I once worked with a client who kept saying, “I’m not good enough for the women I want to meet.” Once he started writing down three things he liked about himself every morning, his confidence shifted. Soon enough, women noticed his energy change, and so did he.
Be Positive
Being positive can change your outlook, your attitude, and how people see and react to you. Make a note of good things that happen daily and try not to dwell on the negatives.
A client I worked with used to complain about every bad date. We ve-framed it by having him list one positive thing after each date, even if it was as simple as “She had a great laugh.” That small shift helped him stay open-minded and less negative in his interactions with others. He ended up meeting his girlfriend on a date he originally thought wasn’t going well.
Building social skills is like building muscles
The more you practice, the stronger you get. Try talking to strangers and starting conversations, takes risk, but rejection is just part of the process. One client that I had just started working with didn't have much dating experience. I advised him to practice and get more comfortable by chatting with female baristas and bartenders before jumping into dating. It’s that simple “How’s your day going?” and striking up conversations made him less nervous when talking to women he was actually interested in.
B