pithy and amusing (“That blue eyeliner is a no”) to introspective. One friend, who is finishing up her fourth year at NYU, wrote, “There is no rush to grow up. There is growth that happens everyday. Focus on that growth rather than the growth you cannot control.”
Another friend was highly prescriptive, as if lamenting over the precious teenaged hours he wasted: “Spend at least one hour of your free time a day doing something ‘productive’ or self improving.
Your future self will thank you for not wasting 6 years on Facebook and instant messenger talking to people who are no longer relevant in your life.”
The consensus from “new adults”, it seemed, was that many of the things we did as teens amounted to “spinning our wheels,” of tormenting ourselves over things out of our control. As a recent ex-kid, I can honestly say being a teen was both crappy and terrifying, and I wish I had a “cool,” older person guiding me through it all.
So, to all of the 15-year-olds out there, here is my (perhaps very uncool) advice:
· Relax. I know it’s tough out there. Everything is changing: your body, your friend groups, your classes, and so on. It is okay to be frustrated, confused, and hurt. It is okay to not know the answer to everything. It is okay to still talk to the loving, accepting adults in your life about the issues you face—both big and small.
· Try to listen to that little voice in your head telling you right from wrong, no matter how “cool” the situation seems.
· Be unapologetically nerdy about that thing you love so much. It will bring you immense joy and nostalgia later in life.
· Be the friend you wished you had.
· Laugh often.
Relax. Breathe. Relax. You have so much ahead of you.