They bring you more joy than you ever thought possible. My husband and I reflect regularly on how happy Harvey makes us. He can always make us smile and laugh, even on the worst of days.
Comparisons aside, with my own share of life’s responsibilities, including my puppy child, any statement to the tune of “if you had kids…,” has begun to fall upon deaf ears. What I say to that: I understand more than you may think - and just enough to know that my dog may be the only child I ever have.
It’s not that I don’t like kids. For me it’s about freeing myself from any pressure to succumb to the status quo. Too many people do things simply because they feel it’s “what they’re supposed to do.” Having children shouldn’t be a “next step,” it should be a burning desire with every inch of your soul.
Many parents I know spend more time talking about what they don’t have as a result of their children than about how happy they are because of them. Of course they love their children unconditionally. But if they are truly honest with themselves, would they follow the same path twice?
Earlier this year, the U.S. Census Bureau released data showing that in 2014 nearly 50 percent of women ages 25 to 29 were childless, a steep increase over the past several years as shown in the comparison tables.
This 2012 Norwegian survey from the other side of the world, revealed out of 5,500 individuals ages 40-80, there was no indication that childless adults had any sign of reduced well-being or happiness in comparison to adults with children.
I’m proud to be part of a generation where people are talking openly about all kinds of choices, including whether or not to have children.Yes, there are couples out there who truly want for children and struggle to conceive, and it’s heartbreaking.
On the other side of the coin, we don’t need to immediately plan the pity party for couples with no kids. Almost certainly the childless-by-choice couples of the world will be happier than those who reproduced out of perceived societal obligation.
For my husband and I, the answer to the oh-so-common question is “not now, probably not soon, and maybe never.”
Truth be told, our puppy child does afford us more freedom than a human child would and we value that freedom above anything else at this point in our lives. We will spend the foreseeable future focused on being great at marriage. Enjoying each other and traveling the world. Enjoying Harvey and being perfectly fulfilled.
If one day we both agree we’d like to spend the next chapter of our life dedicated to happily raising a child, we will. Not because we should, but because we want to.