In my experience, honest feedback can result in the following:
Inspired confidence – You might believe that telling your young athlete that they’re not as good as they think they are will deflate their confidence, but in-fact it can do the exact opposite. It’s very important to emphasize their strengths and things that they do well first, before addressing how they need to improve. Paint the picture of what good looks like and help them understand how to get there. If your child is a competitor, then they will be inspired by the challenge and will build confidence as they accomplish their goals.
Enhanced Mental Toughness – It’s true that playing sports is more mental than physical and building mental toughness is pertinent for success. No one likes losing, but it’s proven that setbacks can help us to become stronger mentally. Don’t be afraid to disappoint your child. Developing a strong mental mindset at an early age will only help them later on in life. When a young athlete is able to focus and overcome an obstacle that they didn’t think was possible, then they’re on their way to accomplishing anything they set their mind towards. As parents, we just have to help them get there.
Created Self Awareness – When we provide honest feedback to our kids it forces them to self-reflect. They become more accountable, which decreases the likelihood of them blaming someone else for their failures. Parents can help to facilitate that awareness by engaging their athlete through discussions and questions about their performance.
We all are our kids “eye in the sky” whether it’s sports, music, dance, or art. In my opinion, the best way to set up our kids for success is to celebrate their victories and to be truthful about their shortcomings. The mama and papa bear in all of us wants to protect our cubs at all costs, but sometimes they’re better off getting a real view of the forest before heading out on their own.