I am about to turn 66, so hearing Mel’s comments hit me like a tsunami. As I threw my shoulders back, my initial thought was “I will show you how great we are in our 60’s” like I need to prove my worthiness. Then that little voice in my head reminded me I had nothing to prove to anyone, yet there I was staring at my body in the mirror and self-criticizing. Does my skin sag too much? Is my belly too big?
I had a major decision to make. Do I stay in the running, or do I remove myself out of self-respect. I knew in my gut I could never stand in front of a man who would speak this way about women, so 11 days before the fly out date, I made the decision to withdraw. At the same time, I learned I was among the final candidates not selected for the cast of 25.
Although I was extremely disappointed with the turn of events, it is not my style to judge but rather focus on finding meaning in my experience that will help others.
Aesthetically, one of the reasons why we often do not like how we look is because as human beings we are not meant to see ourselves that much. Selfies, Zoom, Face Time, Tik Tok. When we are with another person, we sometimes analyze them and decide whether we connect or not. That is how our brains are wired. When we are on a Zoom or Face Time, we self-analyze, which is a problem because our brains are not designed for that type of constant self-monitoring.
Photo Credit Kateryna Hliznitsova