We should have attended church services,
listened to a pastor's preaching and joined other
believers to praise, serve, and worship the Lord.
Too bad, all my expectations turned to nothing.
He now reasoned out that his belief was different
from mine although when he was still courting
me, he did say that he would come with me to our
church.
What would they say to me? That it was my
fault I moved in with a man at such a young age
of twenty, without a job and without a proper
education? That I also moved in with a man
without a job whose only qualities he had were
his good looks, his tallness, and his basketball
skills? And as a dutiful wife to my husband, I
had apprehensions of telling the truth to my
parents. I also had to safeguard his good name
He not only turned a cold shoulder on me, but he
—which is how my parents thought of him.
even ignored our children. My heart broke every
time I saw him act as if our children did not exist.
He should have been happy when our eldest, KC,
started to walk at 12 months or our youngest,
Yes, I gave myself another chance of wishful
thinking that everything would get better. That
everything would fall into its proper place.
Gracia, started to speak “ma-ma” and “pa-pa” at 6
months. But his face was blank as if our children
were nothing to him. And again, fears and doubts
started to evolve in my heart. I had promised to
take the risk just to save our relationship. I had
promised to endure the pain, but it was too much.
There were times I wanted to give up, to leave this
place but it was hard for the three of us—our two
children and I to escape from this hell we were
living in. I could not even call or send a text
message to my parents through my cell phone
because he refused to give me a load. I was a total
stranger to this place. If only someone could help
us easily leave.
But things got worse as the days passed by. KC,
our eldest and I were totally ignored. His
mother—my mother in law who was living with
us (actually we were living in my mother-inlaw’s house; my husband being her only child)
—was only close to Gracia which surprised me.
What surprised me more was as days passed
by, my husband was now giving attention to
Gracia as if she were his only daughter. Months
passed by and both mother and son were now
giving much of their time and attention to
Gracia and that made me really, really
astounded. We were living in one house, a oneroom bungalow that never offered any family
However, there were times that the thought of
contacting my parents did give me chills.
Faith Heart Magazine l 23
member privacy or time alone.