able of the prodigal son.’ We are
all redeemed by our Father’s
love and acceptance.’
How can parents transition
their children from Christian
teen to Christian adult?
Psalms 127:3-5 Behold, children
are a heritage from the LORD,
the fruit of the womb a reward.
Like arrows in the hand of a
warrior are the children of one’s
youth. Blessed is the man who
fills his quiver with them! He
shall not be put to shame when
he speaks with his enemies in
the gate.
When a child is secure in your
love, that their views are valued,
and our decisions on their behalf
are made with wisdom, we are
making it much harder for the
rebellious spirit to rise up and
fight against us and God.
Psalms 139:13-16 ‘for you
formed my inward parts; you
knitted me together in my mother’s womb. I praise you, for I am
fearfully and wonderfully made.
Wonderful are your works; my
soul knows it very well.
If we truly believe the above
Psalm to be true of us, our
Teens need reminding that this
must also be true of them. Praising them for a small kindness
towards younger sibli ngs, being
considerate,
perseverance
through difficult situations or telling them you love their smile.
Such affirmation of their character goes deeper than praise for
achieving good grades. Is it not
of more value in God’s kingdom
to be kind than being the best at
something?
Teens
generally
gravitate
towards others with similar
tastes and interests, which can
be alarming at times! We need to
mindful of whom they are friends
with, without being harshly critical of them, which may provoke
our children to rebel and keep
the relationships secret.
Praying for them every day
makes a powerful difference,
not only for them but for your
own peace of mind. Worrying
about them is counterproductive
and children pick up that anxiety
even if you don’t verbalise it; but
we do don’t we?
gling with school work, not being
chosen for the football team,
arguments with a best friend, or
being tempted to smoke, drink,
take drugs or have sex. All these
issues can be devastating to
teenagers, so over-reacting,
laughing or just making sympathetic noises without really listening will damage your relationship
with them.
If you discover your child has
actually experimented with some
of the above, how you react will
make an important positive or
negative impact on them. Discussing frankly with them what
Matthew 6:34 ‘Therefore do not happened, asking how such
worry about tomorrow, for tomor- experiences affect them, will
row will worry about itself. Each help develop independent thinkday has enough trouble of its ing and decision making abilities.
own.’
If you get a negative report about
your teenager from their School,
Asking God for wisdom about or an angry complaint from
sharing concerns (in confi- another parent, be wise about
dence), with others who have how deal with it. Listen to every
prayerful wisdom and discern- side and pray for guidance, so
ment, will give us time to reflect your child sees you are being fair
and hear how He wants us to in your response. If these comrespond.
plaints are valid, perhaps apologies and an olive branch may be
Matthew 11:29-30 ‘Take my yoke needed. However if your child
upon you and learn from me, for is innocent or there are genuine
I am gentle and humble in heart, reasons for the behaviour, it is
and you will find rest for your so important that you as a parent
souls. 30 For my yoke is easy protect and stand up for them;
and my burden is light.’
not with angry outbursts but with
straight talking to the school or
Teenagers need us to listen the neighbour.
when they feel like talking, then
they will trust us and share their My wife and I told our children
hopes and dreams as well as from a young age if they tell the
their fears and concerns. For truth then we will defend them,
example, they may be self- but if they lie we cannot trust
conscious about their chang- them, which makes it difficult to
ing bodies, (having a cuddle or take their side. Even between
a wrestling match may not be siblings, who are prone to blame
appropriate anymore!) or issues each other for misdemeanat school, like bullying, someone ours committed, learning to be
asking them out on a date, strug- humble enough to admit their