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Left: Soania Mathur, MD with her husband, Arun. Soania was diagnosed with early-onset Parkinson’ s disease in 1999 at age 28. She is a co-founder of PD Avengers, global alliance of Parkinson’ s advocates, and a member of MJFF’ s Patient Council.
Right: Patient Council member Jimmy Choi and his wife, Cherryl. Jimmy was diagnosed with early-onset Parkinson’ s disease in 2003 at age 27. Jimmy has competed on American Ninja Warrior seven times since 2017.
Accepting Help
Some people find it difficult to accept help. If that’ s you, practice saying,“ Thanks for asking. Here’ s what you can do.” Remember, others love you and your loved one and want to help. You’ re giving them that opportunity.
Each fulfilled request frees up some of your time and energy so you can focus on precious resources— perhaps things only you can do for yourself or your loved one, or the things you do best.
Tips to Ask for Help
Consider keeping a separate list of needs to share with your loved one’ s doctor or social worker:“ We’ re struggling with bathing and showering, and I don’ t know what to do,” or“ I’ m having trouble managing Jim’ s medications.” If you don’ t want to ask during an office visit, call to speak with the doctor ahead of time, or ask them to step into the hallway for a quick chat after the exam is over. Turn to How Do I Build a Parkinson’ s Care Team? for more.
Normalize asking for help, even when you’ re not sure what to ask for. If it’ s hard to ask, set up a shared calendar, start a group chat or use a caregiving app where you can post your request and let others choose how and when to help. These strategies mean that you’ re asking people who have already bought in and expressed their desire to help you. If using technology feels overwhelming, ask a tech-savvy friend to pitch in: They’ re not just helping you, they’ re helping everyone involved in your loved one’ s care.
Not everyone you ask will be able to say yes. They may not be able to help right now, with a specific task or at all. Be prepared for these“ no” answers and don’ t take them personally.
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