Personal Development
From Fear To Freedom In Just
7 Steps
H
ave you ever been stopped by the fear of failure, the fear
of success, the fear of rejection, the fear of what others think,
or any other fear? Would you would like to get rid of those
fears once and for all? Then read this article carefully, and
follow these 7 easy steps. Soon the fear that stopped you in
the past will no longer be a factor.
1. Label the fear – First and foremost, you have to clearly
label the specific fear you’re experiencing. Is it a fear of suc-
cess, a fear of failure, a fear of the unknown, etc? Once you
know what it is, you can do something about it.
2.
Say what you make that fear mean to you – In oth-
er words, what are you thinking the negative consequences
of acting on your fear are going to be? For example, if you
are afraid to ask for a higher fee because you don’t want to
be turned down, what do you tell yourself about you? Do
you say, “I’m not good enough.” “Who am I to ask for such
a high fee?” “I’m dumb,” “When I reach out, I get rejected,”
“I’m not cut out to make a lot of money,” etc. Really spend
some time on this, because that’s where the healing begins.
It’s these things that you tell yourself that are the foundation
of all fear. Recognize these and you’ll set yourself free. These
are the things you don’t want the world to see. These are the
things that stop you from moving ahead. This is your core
negative self-image.
3.
Establish the origin of your fear – Once you know
what your fear is and what you make it mean about you, in
order to be able to take control of your fear, you need to un-
derstand how it started. The things you told yourself when
you were young are the beliefs that run your life right now.
Think back to the earliest memories you have of being re-
jected and write them down along with all the memories you
can recall from school, from interactions with your friends,
your family, your teachers, your significant others, cowork-
ers etc. The point is that you have to get to the core. When
you deal with a problem at its core, it doesn’t come back any-
more. Like a weed in a garden, when you pull it out by the
Written By:
Darshan Shanti
roots, it doesn’t grow back. But if you just pull the top off, it
will grow back again and again. The bottom line is that when
you stop running from it, it will stop running you.
4.
Examine what is painful and pleasureful and reverse
them – People are all motivated by avoiding pain or by gain-
ing pleasure. So, if you have failed repeated times and are
about to give up, look what your life will be like 20 years
from now if you let failure win. The key is to create a great
deal of pain in the present by looking to your future and see-
ing what you won’t have if you let fear stop you now. If the
pain of you not reaching your dreams far outweighs the pain
of the temporary defeat you just experienced, you’ll contin-
ue on your path to success. If not, you’ll stay where you are.
Just ask yourself this. “What will the pain be if I don’t do this
thing that I’m afraid to do?” Don’t ask yourself, “What will
the pain be if I do this thing I’m afraid to do?” The first ques-
tion gets you to take action, the second question stops you.
In order to do this, first, write down the costs of being stopped
by these fears. There are untold costs in terms of your mon-