Spending Quality Time with
Your Child
Between work and life responsibilities, the days pass us by in the blink
of an eye. Many parents worry that they don’t spend enough time with
their children, wondering if this will lead to developmental delays. Some
parents feel guilty about working full time, or experience anxiety about
choosing to work out at the gym or go to dinner with friends.
But have no despair! A recent study in the Journal of Marriage and Family questions
the impact the amount of time parents spend with their children has on the academic
achievement, behavior, and emotional well-being of their children. This is not to negate
the importance of time spent with children, but rather, to reinforce the point that quality
of time is much more important than quantity of time. Children need high-quality time
with parents—that is what is most beneficial to children and what can have a positive
effect on them as they grow. It isn’t about endless hours of time—it’s about how you
choose to spend that time that truly matters.
As parents, we can make choices to ensure time spent with our children is high-quality.
Here are nine tips for busy families:
Have a daily “connect” time with your child. Do this face-to-face, if possible; but if
this isn’t an option, create a routine for doing so in other ways, such as leaving a note
in your child’s bag, posting a note by his toothbrush, or writing an encouraging saying
on a shared whiteboard in the house.
Make and eat meals with your children whenever possible. If time is limited, look for
simple meals that require very little preparation, or grab a healthy snack such as an
apple and sit for a few minutes and chat with your child.
Schedule time for doing an activity of your child’s choosing. Be sure to follow
through and complete the activity without any distractions.
Play with your child, even if it’s during bath time or outside before you drop her off at
school. Every little bit of time makes a positive impact!
Laugh and be silly with your child.
Turn off technology when you spend time with your child. Try not to text, answer
calls, scroll through social media, or watch television.
Meaningful connections are about quality of time, not quantity of time. Keep it simple
and connect with your child in ways that make sense for your lifestyle and relationship.
Each connection has a lasting impact and provides the support
and reassurance that your child needs.
Create a special ritual for you and your child—something that can be done every day.
For example, let your child choose and read one book with you at bedtime.
Tell your child you love him/her every day. And tell him/her how important he/she
is to you and how he/she makes you feel.
Reinforce positive behavior. For example, if your child completes his chores without
your asking, acknowledge it with words of appreciation—even if you don’t have the
chance do so until the next day.
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