Sometimes It ’ s Okay To Be A Try-Hard . I was the biggest try-hard from ( I want to say ) the ages of 14 to 16 . I tried so hard to have this look . I wanted to be ‘ indie ’ ( lol ). It seems highkey stupid now , but delving deeper into an actual reflection of this phase , I realised that this is where I was most experimental with my style and it has helped to shape my style today . I scrolled through hours on Tumblr finding cool photos , then hours online so I could aim to ‘ recreate ’ the outfits . I would have days where I pretty much forced my friends to wear coordinated pieces of clothing just to take cool pictures . It sounds so petty as I type this , but I was happy and at the end of the day it all worked out .
Judgement From Those Around You . It can hurt . But people will get used to it . It ’ s weird at first because people aren ’ t used to change . If you ’ re slowly integrating new pieces over time , it ’ ll become normal for you to be experimental with your style . It ’ s daunting at first , but you ’ ve got this . I did it , so can you .
Getting Over The Fear Of Negative Judgement & Criticism . I ’ ve noticed that as I get older , my fear of judgement has slowly diminished . It could solely be due to my growing confidence , but honestly , I think it ’ s also to do with age . There will always be that one judgmental group of people that won ’ t grow up . But everyone else ? They ’ ll move on and start to become more focused on themselves . Once you move beyond secondary education where you ’ re forced to be surrounded by certain people and there ’ s less freedom in style ( uniforms & dress codes ), the more people begin to be experimental . I ’ ve grown to understand that you will never escape judgement . It ’ s more about accepting who the judgement is from . Strangers are irrelevant in your life – they ’ ll enter and leave in a second . Their judgement is unnecessary . Family and friends are harder – acknowledge their opinion , but if you know that what you ’ re doing is right for you – that this is a formof self-expression and who you want to be – keep pushing through , because at the end of the day , this is making you happy . You ’ re not hurting anyone by dressing differently . So the only person that mattersin this situation is you .
You ’ ve Got This . This is broad , this applies to everything , but I want to say that it ’ s okay and you ’ ve got this . Whatever you ’ re facing , regardless of whether we ’ re talking about confidence or style – you ’ ve got this . It ’ s Buddhist philosophy – nothing is permanent , everything will pass .
Don ’ t Dress For Anyone Else But Yourself . It ’ s so important to be doing this for yourself . Don ’ t change who you are to be someone you ’ re not . It ’ s so clichéd , but so true and important . Yes , it ’ s ok to dress similarly to your friends or people whose style you admire , but as soon as you start dressing that way for the sake of having that ‘ aesthetic ’, that ’ s when you need to move on and develop your style .
Be Yourself . Following on from above , be you . Once you find yourself , you have to be yourself . Don ’ t try to copy or mimic other people . Use othersasa mediumto beinspired .
You Can Pull It Off . So many people say to me , ‘ I love what you wear , I wish I could pull it off .’ Well , let me tell you , you can pull it off ! Who cares about body shapes , set aesthetics and not fitting in . You can pull anything off if you want to . If you like something wear it . It ’ s too big and drowns you out ? Wear a belt . Knot it up . Go oversized . The jacket makes your shoulders look wider than the ocean ? Knot it around your waist and wear another jacket on top . Wear it hanging off your shoulders . – Try out new ways to integrate pieces to your style , what you like and feel happiest in . If you do this , you can pull anything off .
You ’ re Never Too Old . Don ’ t let age stop you . You ’ re never too old or too young to start developing your style . I ’ m going to constantly change my style over my lifetime , I know it . I mean , look at Iris Apfel . She ’ s pretty much a white , future 95 year old me .
Fake It Till You Make It . Fake your confidence , not yourself . If you pretend to act confident in what you wear , strut your stuff , keep your head up ( but don ’ t be stand-offish ) and do everything you ’ d normally do … eventually you ’ ll get used to the confidence in clothing and it ’ ll feel normal when people look at the sick vintage look you have on .
A lot of what i ’ ve said overlaps , but it ’ s important to reiterate the key points . Now , go off into the world , find cool pieces , develop your style and be confident in what you wear . The only person stopping you is yourself . This was both cheesy and clichéd , but I hope it was helpful .