Question of the month:
Is it okay to pay for sex?
words by: ana martins
“Why not?”, defends Giselle, owner of male escort service The
Men’s Company. “Of course one might have religious or moral
reasons to reject the idea of sex for money (and that has to be
respected), but apart from that, if a woman over 18 decides she
wants to pay for better sex, should she be denied? A grown woman
should be able to decide what she wants and what she doesn’t want.
It’s a personal matter. A government should not be able to dictate
what someone does in their private time- as long as it stays private,
doesn’t harm her or others, and no illegal activities are involved.
“
A grown woman should be able
to decide what she wants anD
what she doesn't want
Many women booking male escorts are young or middle-aged
widows, not feeling ready to get emotionally involved with a man,
but wanting to rediscover their sexuality. Often there are even
women who are terminally ill who want to enjoy
sex one last time. What are the options?
Just imagine this case and be honest with
yourself; would you (would anyone) dare
to deny these women their wish just
because a part of society thinks ‘it is not
okay to pay for sex’?
“I don’t believe the commodification of sex and sexuality is a
good thing,” argues Meghan Murphy, a feminist and founder of
Current.com. “The idea that anything and everything is a saleable
product has not helped humanity and I am ever appalled at the
way capitalism has been framed as empowerment. Capitalists have
co-opted feminist language in order to sell their product, and The
Men’s Company has done the same. Buying sex has nothing to do
with female empowerment, it’s just another way to make a buck.
“
BUYING SEX HAS NOTHING TO DO
WITH FEMALE EMPOWERMENT, IT'S JUST
ANOTHER WAY TO MAKE A BUCK
Sanitizing it and trying to normalize it with a 'women do it too!'
argument is disingenuous. It's simply a means to pretend as though
the industry isn't deeply gendered, and to further the argument
made by those who profit from the industry that the sex industry
merely exists to help marginalized people who perhaps
can't find love or affection without paying for it.
Sex is not, contrary to popular belief, something we
are entitled to as humans. Sex is something that should
be engaged in voluntarily, by people who both desire
the sex. It is not something that one person should
take from another person or coerce another person
into and, no matter what, the
fact of one person paying
another for sex involves
coercion.
It’s a free world. A sensible grown up
woman should be able to make choices
for herself; and if she wants to pay for
sex, has thought it over well, will not
cause any harm to anyone and she
enjoys it, then IS she degrading herself?
No, of course not. Maybe others believe
that, but then again, it’s a free world,
isn’t it?”
Dawn asked you on Twitter "is it ever okay
to pay for sex?" and you said:
54% Yes!
46% Absolutely not!
The idea that the harm of
objectification will be resolved
if more people are objectified is
wrong. Treating men the way
women are treated doesn’t
resolve the issue of herarchy,
oppression, and abuse – that’s
ridiculous." •
Issue 01 • Dawn Magazine • 4