Trust
or
PART II
Control?
n the second half of this two-part series, Dorcas guides women to the root of
the issue of control. Where does it come from? How does it manifest in our
lives? Sharing her own experiences and wisdom from years of seeking the
Lord, Dorcas identifies the matriarchal spirit that is devastating the lives of
so many women and their families, and provides answers for healing through
Jesus Christ.
Written by Dorcas Stutzman | Photography by Gianna Sensenig
In continuing on, please let me attempt to explain to you how
this desire for control works in us. Maybe it would be easiest to
understand if we look at what the spirit of control is assigned to
do in our lives. It is:
A. ASSIGNED SPECIFICALLY TO DESTROY
THE MANHOOD OF LEADERSHIP
Another woman would keep interrupting her husband as he
spoke, keeping up a running commentary of the details he was
either missing or that he had wrong. It was so painful to listen to!
Later that evening the woman wondered aloud why her husband
had shut down in a corner and wished he could be “more
aggressive like your husband.” My carnal self wanted to deck her,
but I realized she had no clue what she was doing or what was
driving her.
This almost goes without saying. If something or someone wants
to be in control, then leadership of almost any kind is a threat.
This spirit is actually very anti-men. It will strike viciously at a
man’s vulnerable spots as a means of control. In extreme cases,
nothing is off limits. I have seen this spirit publicly, boldly, and
without shame exposing a leader and all of his faults. I have also
helped to pick up the broken pieces of the affected hearts and
marriages.
Many times, however, the matriarchal spirit manifests much
more subtly. Perhaps there is the look of disgust or the deep sigh
that is meant to convey displeasure. Maybe we are simply quiet
while someone else does our dirty work, or we mutter skeptical
comments about our husbands’ ability to lead or accomplish
certain things. Whether we know it or not, all of this is designed
to destroy manhood. Just because we have forced it underground
does not mean that the spirit is not there.
I have seen women publicly cutting their cringing husbands
down in a circle of friends. I remember one lady who stood up in
a gathering and asked for prayer so she could “hang on until my
husband becomes the man of God I’ve always wanted.”
Most of the time women who have controlling spirits are very
nice to be around. As long as you walk the line and do things
their way, you will be treated fairly well, but woe to you if you
ever dare to confront them or cross their will!
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