COMMUNICATION: How To Flirt, Start Conversations And Keep Them Going? The Art Of Succesful Flirting and Dating | Page 9

These distance rules apply particularly in faceto-face encounters. We will tolerate reduced
interpersonal distances when we are side by
side with someone. This is because when you
are alongside someone, it is easier to use other
aspects of body language, such as turning
away or avoiding eye contact, to 'limit' your
level of involvement with the other person.
You can therefore approach a bit closer than
'arm's length' if you are alongside your target –
at the bar counter of a pub, for example –
rather than face-to-face. But be careful to
avoid 'intrusive' body-language such as
prolonged eye contact or touching.
If you have misjudged the appropriate
distance, in either a face-to-face or side-byside encounter, the other person's discomfort may show in his/her body language. Your target may attempt to turn away
or avert his/her gaze to avoid eye contact. You may also see 'barrier signals' such as folded or tightly crossed legs, or
rubbing the neck with the elbow pointed towards you. If you see any of these signs, back off!
Finally, remember that different people have different reactions to distance. If your target is from a Mediterranean or
Latin American country (known as the 'contact cultures'), he or she may be comfortable with closer distances than a
British or Northern European person. North Americans fall somewhere between these two extremes. Different
personality-types may also react differently to your approach: extroverts and those who generally feel