Coaching World Issue 8: November 2013 | Page 10

Exercise: Simple Breathing • Sit upright in a chair or stand up, keeping feet hip-width apart and placing your hands in your lap or letting them hang freely. • Relax your shoulders. When you focus inward on your breath, you will notice that your breaths become deeper and slower, thereby calming your nervous system. If you practice abdominal breathing for a few minutes before each coaching session, you will notice that you are calmer and better able to focus. During the meeting, you will be more in touch with yourself and your client as well as more effective and resourceful. • Close your eyes. • Notice your breath going in and out. Pay attention to this for a few minutes. • When your mind wanders, simply bring your attention back to your breath. CLICK TO TWEET: “The coach’s best allies are calmness and focus.” Centering Yourself Many new coaches find themselves flustered or drawing a blank when they first begin working with clients. Sometimes, this is because they have not taken the time to let go of what they were previously concentrating on and, consequently, are not present to the coaching experience. Sometimes they are nervous and have trouble calming down. In either case, when this happens, they find that their thoughts just do not seem to flow easily. Your best allies are calmness and focus. When you achieve these, the questions flow naturally. Conversely, when you over-think your questions or anticipate where the conversation will go, it feels much harder and you end up doing more work than the coachee. If you find yourself in this state, slow down the process and re-center yourself. One of the simplest ways to calm and focus yourself before a coaching session is to practice abdominal breathing; this is as simple as sitting down and spending a few minutes focusing inwards on your breath. Abdominal breathing helps you get more oxygen into your lungs, gives you something to focus your mind on, and slows your heart and breathing rates. This in turn helps you to be calmer and more focused during your coaching meeting. Although it takes a bit of practice in the beginning, it will soon feel natural and effortless. 10 Coaching World Exercise: Abdominal Breathing • Sit up tall with one hand on your navel. • Relax your belly, close your eyes, and inhale deeply through your nose so that the hand over your navel is pushed outward (your belly should swell like a balloon). • Exhale deeply through your nose and notice how your navel comes back in towards your spine. • Relax your belly even more and breathe deeply without forcing the breath. • Continue for a couple of minutes, breathing deeply and slowly. It is not possible to connect with your client if you are not first connected with yourself. Your best allies in creating a strong connection are calmness and focus. For best results, take a few moments to center yourself before, during or after your coach meeting.