2013 SPRING ISSUE | CHOICES 39 says you get one try and only one. Persistence is, in fact, one of the attributes of most successful people. Persistence means to go on resolutely in spite of opposition. It also means to go back and be willing to change things. You must decide what you want and then go after it. You can modify the process until you get the result you want. If you keep doing the same old thing in the same old way, you’ ll keep getting the same old result. If you want a new result, you must do something differently.
What Will Other People Think?
Most of us have been taught we should be concerned about what others think about us and we should seek their approval for all we do. We hear a little voice in our heads yelling,“ If you fail, you’ ll look like a fool.”
When I was in high school, I didn’ t try out to be a cheerleader because I was afraid I wouldn’ t be as good as the other girls and wouldn’ t get selected for the squad. There it was--my fear of failure. In my mind, if I was rejected, it would mean I failed. So I decided it would be better not to try at all than to try, fail and look like a fool. The sad part of this situation is that with my energy and enthusiasm( not to mention my loud mouth,) I’ d have made a great cheerleader. Would my life have been different if I had been a cheerleader? I will never know because I was too afraid to try. I’ ll bet you can look at your life and remember times when you were too afraid to try. We’ ve all wondered about how our lives might be different now if we had taken a few more chances instead of succumbing to the fear of failure.
What’ s wrong with failure anyway? Why do we let it stop us from doing, achieving, and having what we want? Failure just means you’ ve discovered one more way that doesn’ t work. Thomas Edison worked for more than a year and a half to create a better, longlasting light bulb so it could be used in a mainstream application. During that time he found 9,999 ways that didn’ t work. If he hadn’ t persisted, you might be reading this by candlelight! If you try and still don’ t get the result you want, it simply means you were willing to risk, it may take a little longer than you expected, perhaps your goal was unreasonable, you have to do something differently next time, or you have an opportunity to start something new which is more suited to you.
Wouldn’ t it be wonderful if we could just overcome this fear? We know there’ s always a chance we will fail, so why worry about it? Everyone else has the same chance of failure as we do. We are not the exception to the rule but we will never succeed unless we try.
Life is an Experiment
In life, we try one thing, it works. We try another, it doesn’ t work. Instead of letting it paralyze you, do some self analysis. What went right? What went wrong? What went right that could have gone wrong? What other possibilities are there? Then do something differently. Be deliberate and take reasonable risks. Break down the process into smaller more manageable steps. Put the proper effort into achieving your goals and go after what you want. Keep on trying until you get the desired result.
When you have a goal, a dream or you see an opportunity but you need help to get what you want, let someone know. People will help you if you ask them. If they don’ t know you want something, they will sometimes give it to someone else. Be clear. Don’ t just drop hints. Other people can’ t read your mind. They don’ t know what you dream about or what you’ d like to become. Ask for help and accept it when offered.
( Excerpt from You Are More Than Enough: Every Woman’ s Guide to Purpose, Passion, and Power. Visit: http:// youaremorethanenough. com for more information.)