BROTHER RICE
V OLUME 58, I SSUE 2
Chieftain
O CTOBER 2018
Field Day
Should Be
For All
Field Day Trash Talk
Band Deans build hype for the big showdown
By D Shaffer
Chieftain Staff
Every year, at the beginning of October,
the six bands at Brother Rice compete in
a variety of activities to see who comes
out as the most dominant squad. In the
past three years, Padre Pio has asserted
itself as a serious competitor at Field Day,
winning every time. We at the Chieftain
decided it would be a good idea to stir up
some tension among the bands. The Band
Deans had some interesting things to say.
It is only fitting to start with the jug-
gernaut, Pio. Over the summer, Pio had
a change in Band Deans. Mr. Shaffer,
former mentor group leader of Raphael,
made a Kevin Durant-like move and
joined Pio, the Golden State Warriors of
Field Day. Mr. Barnes, Pio’s former Band
Dean, commented on the acquisition
saying, “I’m confident that Coach Shaffer
will continue the winning tradition, and
B R OTHE R R IC E H IG H S C H O O L C H I E F TA I N
his bench-coaching skills will be criti-
cal in making last-minute-substitution
decisions in Madden Football and chess,
for example.” Shaffer will bring nothing
beneficial to Padre Pio’s strategy; he’s just
there to get a ring and get out.
It is apparent that Senior Charlie
Lamarche, a Band Captain in Raphael,
is riding the high of last year’s Band of
Brothers Cup, as he simply said, “Kiss my
ring.” Also, Mr. Kase, Dean of Raphael,
does not seem too fond of Pio’s offsea-
son move, asserting that, “Hoisting the
Edmund Rice Challenge Cup the second
time this year will be made all the sweet-
er by beating that turncoat rookie Dean,
Shaffer, and his new Band, St. Padre
Pio!” Kase is out for blood this year, so be
aware.
Mr. Riker, Dean of Sebastian, is ready
for battle this year, after coming in fi fth
See TRASH TALK on Page 2
P AGE 1
By Trevor Tosto
Chieftain Staff
Ah, Field Day. A time to separate the
men from the boys. Or, well, at least,
for the athletic kids. If you’re athletic,
then Field Day is just a blast from start
to fi nish. But if God was fi lling out a
MyPro profi le for you and said, “Nah,
athletics: 25 out of 100,” then good
luck on Field Day.
For the boys in back, winning the
big points during Kahoot matches, we
salute you. And for the manliest men
taking on the Brick Breaker challenge,
your back might snap from carrying
Trevor Tosto
your whole band. You’re all the real
MVPs.
Being an unathletic kid during
Field Day is like those kids in T-ball
who couldn’t hit a fair ball off the tee,
compared to those who bombed it
to the fence. Like we all know, those
kids were a 9th or 10th batter, and the
whole team was already putting on
their gloves for the infi eld while the
batter was at the tee.
(Luckily, not to brag, I maintained
the name T-bomb for many years.
See FIELD DAY on Page 2
O C T O B E R 2018