motHer's day 19
CHAUTAUQUA STAR
FRIDAY, MAY 2, 2014
Forgiving Your Mother
the hatred and negativity held onto for all those
years and open yourself
up to a more mature and
Not everyone has the
trusting relationship with
pleasure of being raised
yourself, your mother
by a caring, nurturing
and loving mother. Some and your family.
have the misfortune of
The concept that a
being the offspring of
mother-daughter relamothers that lack the
tionship can be so sigability to be mothering
nificant in a woman’s life
in any way, shape or
is based on the theory of
form. They are not nur- attachment. A mother is
turers by nature, raise
the first person that one
their children like pets
becomes attached to as
and go through life only we begin our life and
caring about themselves. this attachment becomes
For women raised by
the foundation for a perthese kind of mothers,
son’s sense of self-esteem
it’s hard not to be angry, and their future relationbitter, sad or unforgiving ship style. If a mother
toward her, particularly only knows how to be
on Mother’s Day. Maybe mean, emotionally or
you haven’t spoken to
physically distant, jealyour mother in years
ous or overly critical, her
or would rather send a
children are likely to be
greeting card than sit in either ambivalent when
the same room with her it comes to relationships
constant criticisms and
or avoidant.
negative attitude. She is
The child never experiyour mother and your
ences unconditional
relationship with your
love, not even from their
mother affects many of
mother, the one person
the other relationships
they would expect to be
in your life. By forgiving that way. By never healyour mother for her faults ing this type of motherand her misdeeds, you
daughter relationship, a
can eliminate some of
woman can find herself
By Dodi Kingsfield
Contributing Writer
constantly struggling
with relationships and
other elements of her
life. She may have issues
with confidence, trust
or setting boundaries in
relationships. She could
have difficulties with selfperception, continuously
avoids difficult situations,
becomes overly sensitive
or touchy, and may even
be accused of not falling
too far from the tree.
If there was a history of
abuse or other violent
behavior, it’s best to
work with a