“ Lot of holes in this story of yours , God ,” the snake said . “ You !” God wheeled on the snake . “ It is your fault my precious people disobeyed me . You tempted her !” “ She was already eating when I found her ,” the snake said . “ Silence !” God bellowed . “ You shall be punished . You will crawl on your belly for all of your days .” The snake looked at God . “ That ’ s it ? Slithering is an efficient way to get around , you know .” “ That ’ s not all ,” God roared . “ Also ... also … no one will like you !” “ I like you ,” Eve said , reaching down to pat the snake ’ s head . “ What will happen to me , Lord ?” Adam asked , trembling . “ You ’ re going to have to work for your food . Work hard . You ’ re going to get sweaty .” “ Please , no , that sounds awful !” Adam threw himself in supplication at God ’ s feet . God crossed his arms in front of his chest . “ And you are exiled from my garden , all of you !” At this , Adam began to weep . “ Come on ,” Eve said to the snake . “ I ’ m tired of this boy ’ s club . Let ’ s go .” “ I haven ’ t told you what your punishment is ,” God said to Eve . “ Whatever it is , I ’ ll endure . My kind is stronger than you realize .” God gaped at her , slack-jawed . Eve bent down to allow the snake to slither up her arm . They walked away from the tree . Adam sniveled an apology to God and then chased a er them . “ Wait for me ,” he called out . “ Slow down !” Eve looked at the apple core in her hand . She pulled out three shiny seeds , closed her fist around them , and tossed the rest of the core behind her as she and the snake continued to walk towards the boundary of Eden .