CANADIAN PHYSIQUE ALLIANCE SEPTEMBER || ISSUE 38 | Page 50

A year ago, I went to a doctor that specializes
in hormone balancing and got a full panel
done; checking everything from vitamins to
hormones, to whatever else blood work tells
you. I was trying to shake off the remnants left
from a serious bout of depression and while
antidepressants took the edge off, there was
something more going on. The results were a
bit staggering. My testosterone,
progesterone, vitamins B, D, and DHEA were
all seriously in the gutter. My sugars were
high, suggesting diabetes could be in my
future. I was suffering from adrenal fatigue.
So we started a hormone and vitamin
protocol.
When the emotional rollercoaster of suddenly
being able to relate to a pregnant woman’s
emotional outbursts leveled off, I felt more
motivated, wasn’t falling asleep on the couch
after work, and the glorious sleep during the
night was unprecedented. It was life-changing
and I tell you this because while willpower or
discipline is a component, sometimes there is
something more.
I have seen therapists, psychiatrists,
psychologists, and so on for many years while
battling the eating disorder of bulimia, binging
and purging to just binging and all the
emotional baggage that goes along with that.
It’s been many years since I have had a
purging episode and my binges have
subsided. I think it is fair to say that when it
occurs, it is now overeating or emotional
eating.
But it still lives with me. It is hard to find a
good therapist, but one definitely shone
through about 4 years ago. She really helped
me as I worked through my darkest
depression and one of the hardest times in
my life. Rosalyn Fung really gave me some
tools and inner connection. I am grateful for
her impact on my emotional wellbeing and
want to pay her an homage. Now, in
conjunction with this column, I will be working
with CPA Ambassador, Lesley Timbol,
Registered Psychotherapist, who is also a
Mental Game Coaching Professional. We are
going to cognitively tackle some things that
are holding me back, reframe some of the
negative thought processes, and I am excited
to have her on my team. There is a huge
mental component for all, in one way or
another.
I want to share a well-rounded depiction here.
To lay the groundwork to understand a story
that is human, emotional, tenacious, and
determined. Does it have to be this
complicated? Maybe not. Is it for me? Yes.
Am I alone in these complexities? It’s NOT
possible. My goal this month is to simply
apply discipline and make new habits stick,
discarding the old in the process which will
equate to several Facebook status updates of
smashing legs and crushing chest in the gym,
sweaty selfies, and several IG posts of my
perfectly portioned meals. Kidding, you know
what I mean!