False Assumption
“I repel others”
“Others do not trust me”
ust for me” just for me."
After having suffered a significant disappointment we may only know ourselves by the scar left behind. The scar, understandably, leaves a person feeling grieved, confused, and full of rage. Often this emotional reaction interferes with seeing life differently. A person might find herself interpreting responses from others as more negative with a greater sense of hurt, rejection, and loneliness. Alternatively, positive comments are often dismissed or go unnoticed. One way of combating negative ideas (i.e., “Everyone excludes me”) fixed in your mind is rehearsing a helpful response. Refer to the example below.
Negative Idea (I am...):
1 injured
2 disabled
3 abandoned
Extending forgiveness is not necessarily a solitary event. Typically, preparing to forgive is a process that unfolds over time. Choosing to forgive allows one to acknowledge a wrong was committed without insisting on “compensation” to bring life back into balance. Reaching a place of forgiveness can be supported by a practice of reflection on a life no longer defined only through pain. You now have the capacity to honor the dignity of every person and invest in your own path to healing. We must certainly denounce destructive behavior of those who perpetrate harm. At the same time, when reminded of the violation(s), you will likely have to reassert your decision to not wish harm or seek retribution.