5. Ask for help. That first step may have been intimidating. If the first step is hard, “Will I be able to go the distance?” may be your question. No matter who you are, there is someone rooting for you – you just have to find them. If your “next” is embracing healthy relationships, however, you may need to walk out part of the first steps alone while you evaluate your part in the unhealthy relationships you have had. Relationships on any level must be mutually beneficial in order to be healthy. You can still ask for help from a therapist, minister or coach.
6.Enjoy the scenery. Embracing what’s next includes being in unfamiliar places and situations. You may venture to a networking event alone, for instance. You might celebrate a birthday with different people or in another kind of activity. In new situations we can be so nervous about the new that we miss the beauty of change and learning new things about ourselves.
7.Don’t get stuck in “A Next” that is not “Your Next.” Along the way to your next you will encounter some incredible possibilities. On your way to becoming a fashion designer, for example, you may discover a real talent at merchandising. Be cautious and analyze if your search is leading you to a career in merchandising, or is your knack for merchandising something that will give you an edge as a designer. Once we learn to enjoy the scenery of a new place, opportunities open will open to us, but don’t mistake a beautiful distraction for an opportunity.
8.Find your tribe. Who are the people that can go with you to your Next? In the words of Maya Angelou’s poem, Alone: “Nobody, but nobody, can make it
out here alone.” In your Next you may need a mentor who has gone the way you want to go and can help you navigate some of the rocky places. You may also need a coach, someone who can walk alongside you and encourage you to keep going. Most of all you will need true friends: people who will see you at your scared worst and victorious best and love you the same. Don’t mistake every acquaintance for a friend, and don’t overlook true friends as you move into your Next.
9.Ask for help. I know I said that already, but in the new place you must still have help. Where you have been arrogant in the past, practice humility. Where you have walked alone and in fear, seek out others and pursue relationships courageously. When you feel overwhelmed, tell someone. Graciously receive help and extravagantly give in return or advance.
10. Embrace Next! Everyone in your current circle won’t be comfortable with you now. Accept that, and politely move them to a circle less close. You have done the work and experienced the highs and lows of change. Look around. Breathe in the air. Be grateful for those who are with you and for those who can no longer be with you in the same way. Stop moving and allow yourself to experience gratitude for every painful experience that led you to this place. Honor your journey with a moment of silence, and then open your arms to hug everything that is wrapped up in Your Next.
Michele Aikens is a certified life coach and CEO of Sepia Prime Communications & Consulting. Do you need help finding your next? You can email Michele at [email protected]