Big KIDS
Raising
W
“the Bully”
ell, the new school year has
started and let’s just say I hope
the first day does not speak for
the rest of the school year. I dreaded the start
of the new school year because my son does
not always get along with other students and
uphold the rules of the school, particularly,
“be respectful.” Some students and parents
have gone as far as to label him a bully!
So what is a bully? Dictionary.com defines a bully as, “a
person who intimidates smaller or weaker people.” Based on
this description, it seems as if the word is used rather loosely
to describe various forms of conflict in educational settings
and even the workplace resulting in over usage.
I can truly say that the majority of the times my son has
an incident at school, it does involve someone smaller than
him because unfortunately for my son, he is very tall for his
8
BERMUDA PARENT MAGAZINE
age. At his 8 year old checkup, it was reported
to us that he is the average size of an 11 year
old. We are constantly reminding him of his
size because when he skylarks with the other
children he does not realize his strength and
can unintentionally harm another child during
rough play. While skylarking is a part of grow-
ing up for boys, I strongly remind my son that
it is not allowed due to my fear of him harming
other children. Sometimes his physical contact
is unprovoked, for instance, tripping someone.
On other occasions he is triggered by a com-
ment or action made towards him and nine
times out of ten, his response, usually hitting,
does not equal the trigger. This is what our
conversations sound like:
Me: Why did you hit so and so?
Him: Because he called me dumb.
We talk to him about controlling his
anger and not letting it get the best of him.